Transported Into Applesauce

So I went to a party recently. It was an 80s party, disco style. Lots of fun, and free drinks from 8-10pm. Lots of scantily clad females, and lots of neon colored gents. I was there from 7.30 until about 11, when I left to come home (I had class the next morning). However, I got lost on the way home cause someone told me to get on the wrong bus, and it took me 2.5 hours to get home. Kind of drastic, but I'll spare you the details. The point of this post is to tell you a couple of funnies.

So, the joke of the year (not day, week, or month, but year):
Person #1: I want to give you an Aussie kiss.
Person #2: What's an Aussie kiss?
Person #1: It's like a French kiss except Down Under!

I laughed so hard I choked myself on my drink.

The second one to record isn't really a joke. We were playing drinking games on the bus on the way to the party, and Liam and Mark starting singing the following song. It's a repeat song, so they would sing a line, and then we would sing the line. I can't remember all the words, but a couple of the refrains went something like this:

I wish that all the ladies
were buns on a shelf.
And if I were a baker
I'd fill them with my cream.

I wish that all the ladies
were waves in the ocean.
And if I were a surfer
I'd ride them with my motion.

I wish that all the ladies
were bricks in a wall.
And if I were a brickie
I'd lay them by the mile.

It carried on like this for a while, but it got progressively harder to understand what everyone was screaming. A grand night, overall! Except the getting lost...